This week I spent the afternoon with my little granddaughter Scarlett, and as usual, she dropped some little gems into our conversations. This particular one made me think about trust and beliefs, what they mean and the difference between the two… We had been for a lovely walk, complete with pushchair, baby, and Buddy the dog. It had all started out delightfully, then Buddy had decided to poop on the pavement, I had the necessary poop bags with me to clean up after him whilst Scarlett in a very loud indignant voice, proclaimed “why would Buddy poo on the pavement!” I had to admit I agreed with that sentiment. Not having a dog myself, and not liking the idea of carrying a poop bag full of Buddy’s business, I thought I could pop it into baby’s (doll) pushchair until we found the dog bin. “Oh no” said Scarlett, “no, too stinky to be near baby”, again I had to agree with the sentiment and I duly carried it to the dog bin.We arrived home hot and tired, dropped Buddy off and dashed out to collect 3 boys from school and planned to pop across the road to the play park. The boys ran ahead and Scarlett was following, “Don’t go on the road”, I shouted for fear of squished children. The boys ignored me but waited on the pavement and Scarlett piped up, “I know that Mama, my Mummy has told me not to go on roads, I do know how to take care of myself”. Again I had to agree with the sentiment, but it was this one that got me thinking about trust and trust in yourself.
You see Scarlett is still young enough (just!) to trust herself fully, she knows without any doubt that she shouldn’t go on roads and trusts herself not to, to her it is unequivocal, but to me, I didn’t have that trust in her, I doubted her ability to take care of herself and voiced my worries.
Now, I’m not saying that I was wrong, not at all, the point is how each and every one of us is born with that deep sense of trust, trust in ourselves. Somewhere along the line, most of us lose this sense of trust, in fact we are taught just the opposite: we are taught not to trust ourselves but that we should trust our parents, teachers, authority, government, religion, anyone and everyone but ourselves.
Why??? Trust is so powerful and important to us. Trust comes from your heart not the mind, it’s in your very being, it is part of who you are, you have to trust in you before you can have trust in others, it needs nurturing, it is dynamic not static but the essence of trust cannot be changed.
Beliefs on the other-hand are mostly handed down, second hand – they come from others, they are manufactured, they are in the mind not the heart, they don’t need nurturing, they can be changed – quite easily, BUT they can remain with you for your whole life and unless you eliminate them they stay put.
Beliefs we need to observe, question and often remove to truly discover who we are and create the changes we desire, but trust is only possible if you trust in yourself first and it should be embraced and encouraged as to trust in yourself gives you a deep sense of knowing and freedom.
Do you trust in you?